The Hidden Fuel to Reach Your Goals

You started off strong with your new year’s intentions, fueled by the promise of positive change and personal growth. The first few days were  a breeze, and you felt an confidenct in your ability to stay on track. However, as the days pass, you find yourself grappling with exhaustion, tension, and the growing allure of reverting to familiar habits.

Rethinking Frustration

It's important to recognize that the frustration you're experiencing is not a roadblock but a crucial part of the transformative journey. Understanding the science behind this frustration can empower you to use it as a propeller toward your goals, thanks to a fascinating aspect of our brain called neuroplasticity.

Understanding the brain’s response to frustration

Neuroplasticity, the brain's remarkable ability to reorganize itself, is at the heart of our capacity for change. While we are all capable of rewiring our brain and nervous system, they are naturally inclined towards safety. However, safety doesn't always equate to what's best for us; it simply means our nervous system is accustomed to a particular way of functioning. Our brain, our nervous system is designed for safety.  Safety doesn’t necessarily mean something is good for you. It just means that your nervous system is USED to a certain way of doing and being. 

Discomfort is Part of the Process

When you engage in learning or adopt new habits, your brain releases a cascade of signals and neurochemicals, namely epinephrine and acetylcholine. Your nervous system, wired for familiarity, attempts to follow its well-trodden paths. The introduction of something new, though, sends a signal that disrupts this routine, leading to the release of epinephrine—a neurotransmitter associated with alertness and focus. In the realm of creating new habits and learning, this neurochemical is closely tied to the emotion of frustration.  Basically, your brain is trying to respond to your new habit with an old way of being and is getting the message, “this isn’t working.”  The message of change is not working with the typical and familiar pathway the nervous system is used to.  This discomfort is PART of the process of change.  The errors themselves is the signal to the brain that something needs to change.  This is so important that it bears repeating: your brain NEEDS to repeatedly have the error in order to create change.

Frustration is a cue

Frustration, then, is not a sign of failure or inadequacy but a natural response to the conflict between the desire for change and the ingrained pathways of our nervous system. Embracing this discomfort as an integral part of the change process is crucial. It acts as a cue to your body, signaling that the familiar isn't working, and a shift is necessary.

Sticking with the frustration, rather than giving in and giving up on your goals, becomes the catalyst for change. Frustration is connected with errors and it’s the errors that signals the need for plasticity in your brain.  It prompts your brain to acknowledge that the status quo is no longer working, and adaptation is needed. Quitting, on the other hand, only reinforces the association of frustration with failed attempts at change. To quote Andrew Huberman,” frustration that leads us to just quit and walk away from the endeavor is the absolute worst thing.”

Frustration is the CUE the body needs for change. 

So, the next time frustration creeps in, view it not as an obstacle but as a vital cue for transformation. Embrace the discomfort, stay the course, and let frustration become the guiding force propelling you towards meaningful change. Remember, the journey to self-improvement is not always easy, but each moment of frustration is a sign that you're on the right path. When you look at frustration this way, it then becomes an experience to relish, because it means that change is right around the corner.